Fire Star Luke

Luke has dubbed himself "Fire Star Luke". He's been doing this for about 6 months now. His friends at school even call him that. It all started with a pair of flame covered slip on vans which make him run extra fast. I made him a flame covered star shirt for Xmas which he wears all the time too. Sometimes he adds other names like ninja or magician to his name as well.

Luke has started writing his name! It's pretty cute. Sometimes the "L" is upsidedown and he likes to add both an upper and lower case "e". He also likes to draw rainbows and fire. For the longest time he would just draw what he called cake makers which were mostly abstract designs. He also now draws faces which ALL have mustaches. Go figure. It's interesting to watch his drawings become more complex.

Luke is a great big brother for the most part. He can be a little rough but what else are big brothers for?

1 month

This month has flown by. Between the holidays and nursing the days seem to role into one. My new lil cutie Levi is adorable. He's a chunky guy that eats almost every hour during the day (and sometimes more frequent than that). He's even a good sleeper at night. He just wakes to eat and goes right back to sleep. I love listening to his little grunts and snorts. He's becoming more responsive and giving more smiles. I'm trying my best to savor this short amount of time as a tiny squishy baby. We're not sure if he'll be our last one or not :)

Big sister Lucy watching over Levi

Luke adores his little brother... more so than I expected. Perhaps because I always found my younger siblings annoying. He wants to hold his hand and hug him all the time. He does get impatient when he has to be quiet or wait for something but all of that is normal. He feels very important in his new role as big brother and tells anyone who will listen that he has a baby brother.

touching his hair

and nose

The guys

One week old Levi with Santa, Luke and his cousins Marie and Russel. Marie told me she was too old to take pictures with Santa and didn't want any little girl presents this year :( She's growing up too fast (they all are).

Chilling in his Bumbo. I love that seat but he can't quite hold up his head for too long yet.

Blue steel?

Levi Taylor Stetson

Family of four 

At 9 days overdue I had tried acupuncture (2 times), been to my chiropractor, drank tons of red raspberry leaf tea, taken evening primrose oil, walked daily, and eaten lots of spicy foods to help get this little boy out but he was being stubborn. He was posterior, like his older brother, and not descending into the pelvis. So on my midwife's recommendation I took some lemon verbena essential oil mixed with apricot juice, almond butter, and a little bit of castor oil. And it worked because within 3 hours of taking it I started having regular contractions (around 2 pm)! I had been getting contractions off and on for a few days but nothing that became regular or increased in intensity.

Super Overdue

As luck would have it, Luke was already staying with my mom. I called Alan to come home but I wasn't convinced it was actual labor since I had taken the lemon verbena and thought it could wear off. I labored for a few hours bouncing on a exercise ball and on my hands and knees in front of the fireplace hoping to turn him into a better position. My contractions were coming every 3ish minutes and lasting about a minute but were still pretty mild.  Alan kept busy by handling incoming calls, timing my contractions and getting things ready.

I wasn't sure what to expect with Al this time. We had both been pretty freaked out and uncertain when Luke was born. I had a lot of fear that this birth would turn out like Luke's, with me giving up and transferring to the hospital. But Alan was my rock. He's the strong silent type which was just what I needed. He gave me quiet support by holding my hands and helping me move (not an easy task). It was surprising how intimate this birth felt. In fact my entire pregnancy was like that. I feel like I was more open and willing to be vulnerable which brought us closer.

Somewhere around 8 pm my midwife stopped by to check on me. My contractions had got more intense around the same time and she called her assistant and the student midwife to come over.  I was happy that I hadn't vomited yet as I was expecting, with Luke the vomiting started very early in the labor which wore me out. She checked me and I was 3 cm. I hadn't changed from my last appointment except for being more effaced. That was discouraging but my contractions got even more intense and I started vomiting (yay!). I have no idea how many times over the coarse of the night but it seems my "bucket" was always in the wrong room. After that point I lost track of time.

I labored lying on my side for a while were I could totally relax in between contractions. Alan says I actually feel asleep in between but I remember people talking around me. I took a shower, walked around the house, sat on the toilet. At some point I was checked again and was at 6 cm! I was relieved that I was making progress despite this baby still being posterior. I lost my bloody show at one point and was starting to really struggle through contractions. I kept telling Alan I didn't want to do this anymore... he didn't say anything that I remember. My midwives were encouraging me and telling me not only that I could do but I was doing it. I would have cried but that would have taken way too much energy that I didn't have. I shook a lot. My teeth were even chattering. Despite the pain, I wasn't scared or panicked.

I moved to the bedroom and was checked again. I was 8 cm and and had just a little bit of cervix left. My midwife wanted to break my water to increase the contractions which I wasn't too keen on. I felt like I was barely coping as is but more contractions would speed up the process. I didn't see the light at the end of the tunnel since I could only focus on one contraction at a time. At that point I started vocalizing through each contraction. Someone made a joke that the police might show up because of all the noise I was making.

Then I had the urge to push. I still had some cervix left and I was told to not push.... quite impossible to do. I didn't feel the urge with Luke since I had an epidural but, it was uncontrollable and harder to do than I expected. I don't remember being told I was at 10 cm but at some point my team switched to encouraging me to push instead of holding off. I had to change positions four times since the baby's heart rate was dropping (probably due to the cord being compressed).  Eventually I was settled into a squatting position with Alan holding me from behind for support. When his head was pushed out he was anterior. I have no idea when he turned. With the next push the rest of his body came out. He was red, chubby, and whaling. I never had any doubt that my baby would be healthy but was still comforted to see this little bundle of squirming life. We double checked to make sure he was indeed a he (you never know).

The order of events after this are a little fuzzy for me. I was pretty grateful to be done with labor and wiped out. I don't remember what Alan exactly said to me but I felt his pride in my accomplishment and lots of love. I held Levi  for a while and then Alan took him so we could take care of the placenta and repair tears. When I looked at Alan, he had fallen asleep with Levi on top of him, it was 4 am after all. Levi got his check next and was a breastfeeding champ. They fixed me something to eat and I had a shower. After that, they tucked us into bed and left around 7 am.

Levi getting checked over by Melissa, our wonderful Midwife

He was a thumb sucker right away

Getting weighed 8lbs 9oz

Nana meeting Levi

Later that day my mom and sister came over. They did my barf laundry, cleaned up, and filled my fridge. Perfect baby guests! They were originally going to be at the birth but as it got closer I was feeling the need for more privacy and it just worked out better to not have Luke at the house. 

Luke meeting Levi

Luke has taken all of this surprisingly well. He made some initial comments about putting the baby back in my tummy but now he's smitten with him. He wants to hold his hand all the time and is the best one in the house to get Levi to smile so far. 

All wrapped up and cuddling

He looks way chubbier than Luke but he was only a few ounces more than, it must be in the cheeks. Breastfeeding has gone way better. The first week was a little tough. Levi was getting used to latching well. This kid has an intense appetite, feeding every hour during the day.

Levi and Daddy

Brothers

40+ weeks....

I'd probably add crying for random reasons and fielding questions from strangers. 

I've been super "uncomfortable" for weeks now. I say uncomfortable because painful doesn't quite describe it. Those of you who are interested (TMI alert), I'm 3 cm already but not in active labor. Just several weeks of small, mild contractions. It's draining to say the least. My back hurts and I'm pretty sure my pelvis is going to split in two. He's got to come out at some point, right? But at least "things" are happening.  It took me 15 hours of active labor to get to 3 cm with Luke. When real labor actually starts I'll be that much closer.

A little pregnancy humor for your enjoyment:

Homebirth

Baby Luke

We've chosen a homebirth  for this baby which is either met by fear from those who love us, negative judgment from those who think we are ignorant, or solidarity from those within the natural birthing community. Either way there are lots of strong options on how one should have a baby. Conventional opinion is that it be done in a hospital with an OB. However, when in a hospital you loose autonomy. Even if you want to have a unmediated birth you will face hospital policies and several interventions that you'd have to fight when in a very valuable position.

Most hospitals require continuous fetal monitoring (belt strapped around you), an IV, frequent cervical checks (very uncomfortable), use of labor augmentation tools if labor is not progressing at one centimeter per hour (Pitocin, breaking water, etc), and not much choice when it comes to what positions you labor in (mostly on your back in bed). You will also most likely get an episiotomy. When these interventions are "offered" it goes some thing like this: While in the middle of a contraction the Dr. says "I'm going to give you a little episiotomy". Notice how they don't ask but just tell you. That is their idea of informed consent. Been there, done that.

With these interventions, I'm at a much increased risk of c-section and infection. Not to mention the crazy long list of epidural risks (including maternal or fetal death). This is not to say that homebirth doesn't have risks. I don't have an OR in my house in case of emergency. But I do live within 1 mile of a hospital and have a very experienced midwife that is not afraid to transfer me if any warning signs should pop up. My midwife can also stop hemorrhages and is trained in infant resuscitation. She carries oxygen, pitocin, and bunch of other medications in case of emergency. She carries a doppler and monitors the baby closely during labor. I have a lot of faith that I can do this and that it is natural to labor and birth without intervention however, I wouldn't rely on faith to make medical decisions as they come up.

Ideally, I image that I go into labor at my home. It will probably be cold and rainy outside and warm and cozy inside. Alan and Luke will be here. I won't have to worry about getting in the car to get to the hospital. I can freely wander my house, get in and out of the shower, eat and drink when I want to, and get into what ever position is comfortable. There won't be any strangers telling me what to do. I will be safe and free to be vulnerable because my team knows and supports me.

Leavenworth

These are from September but I wanted to get them up. We go to Leavenworth at least once a year. There was a big fire this year that made the air quality pretty poor but we went anyway. This year we took a group picture in Bavarian wear.

I dressed as a man in my lederhosen. I was hoping the pregnant belly would look like a beer belly.

Not sure what that face is?

We also went tubing. The river was pretty low  this year. The frisbees are paddles.

All the kids

Jordan, Justin, Alan, and Luke at the Munchin Haus (brats and beer)

Halloween

 I love me some Halloween and have always wanted to have pregnant belly to dress up some how. My zoombie baby ripping from my stomach (which I wore all day) caused a lot of double takes, looks of disgust, and a few chuckles. People need to get a sense of humor! I did end up adding more blood to the final look.

 Luke opted for Superman, again, which he got to wear to preschool. Aren't they cute?!

 Alan's Ron Swanson Bacon pumpkin.

 He's got a splitting headache. 

Trick or treating. We were spared from rain, thankfully. Luke was super excited and more one than once said "halloween is awesome!". Yes, yes it is.

On a side note our cat Motors disappeared for almost two weeks. I totally thought he was dead. He's old... about 14 years old. I had read that sometimes older pets leave their families to die. We put up posters and even got a phone call from someone saying they saw him on a trail near by. He came back a few pounds lighter but otherwise just as healthy on Halloween.